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Sunday, May 28, 2017
How Important Am I?
Father's Day is just around the corner and I'm wondering how important I am to my children. Will I get a face to face visit or will they just shoot me a text on social media? Doing the facebook thing will at least let all their followers know what a great kid they are, but what will it tell me? I think children miss the point a lot. Maintaining regular contact doesn't mean clicking like on photos we post on instagram. It means showing up to be in the photos. If anything, it will save you the trouble of trying to come up with some excuse at my funeral as to why you never spent time with me while I was alive. Know what I mean. Jellybean.
Friday, May 12, 2017
Don't Forget To Hug Your Mom
Mother's Day will soon be here. My mom died 21 years ago. Bone
cancer. It was the day after Mother's Day. I was with her on Mother's
Day but I wasn't there when she needed me the most. Sometimes life
doesn't happen the way we think it should. We just have to keep in
our memories the moments worth living.
When I think about it, I don't know a whole lot about who my mother was, apart from being my mother, that is. She suffered a lot of abuse, that much I know. My father wasn't very kind to her. He was an abusive drunk. He failed at a lot of things he tried to do and he took most of his anger and his frustrations out on her, until I was old enough to prevent it.
I remember what my mother said to me when she was dying. She said she was proud of me for trying to do something with my life and for trying to get away from the booze. She said she was glad I didn't turn out like my old man. Well, mom, I was actually a lot like him. I was a drunk, just like him. I failed at a lot of things I tried to do, just like he did. I was angry and frustrated a lot and, like my father, I took my anger out on people in my life. I was never physically abusive to women. I just chose forms of abuse I could live with.
Luckily, I did manage to put the bottle down, almost 20 years ago, and I was able to do something useful with my life. So I guess I didn't fail at everything.
For those of you who still have a mother, don't forget to hug her and tell her that you love her, and don't wait until Mother's Day to do it, because we never know how long they'll be with us.
When I think about it, I don't know a whole lot about who my mother was, apart from being my mother, that is. She suffered a lot of abuse, that much I know. My father wasn't very kind to her. He was an abusive drunk. He failed at a lot of things he tried to do and he took most of his anger and his frustrations out on her, until I was old enough to prevent it.
I remember what my mother said to me when she was dying. She said she was proud of me for trying to do something with my life and for trying to get away from the booze. She said she was glad I didn't turn out like my old man. Well, mom, I was actually a lot like him. I was a drunk, just like him. I failed at a lot of things I tried to do, just like he did. I was angry and frustrated a lot and, like my father, I took my anger out on people in my life. I was never physically abusive to women. I just chose forms of abuse I could live with.
Luckily, I did manage to put the bottle down, almost 20 years ago, and I was able to do something useful with my life. So I guess I didn't fail at everything.
For those of you who still have a mother, don't forget to hug her and tell her that you love her, and don't wait until Mother's Day to do it, because we never know how long they'll be with us.
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