rear view mirror

 my sobriety date is getting closer. it's like turning 30 or 50 or 70. you wonder if you're where you should be by now or you become reflective and start looking in the rear view to see where you were and if you've moved far enough ahead to justify becoming a year older. generally, whenever I attend a midwinter roundup, as I do every year, I always feel somehow older. that was last February and I did feel changed. but, here I am now, it's late November, in a few days I will reach a new milestone in sobriety. 27 years. it is often said that once we start drinking, we stop growing emotionally. I  started drinking when I was twelve and by the time I stopped, 29 years later, I was still 12 years old. it's been 27 years so now I am 39 years old emotionally if you follow it through and of course if you believe that school of thought.